Hi, my name is M, and I'm an introvert who likes to make things up.
Hi, M, whispers the support team.
Large groups of people make me nervous unless I'm showing off in front of them. One-on-one conversations with strangers cause so much sweating and conversation-rehearsing that I'm amazed no one notices that my responses sometimes sound crafted (because they are).
So picture this. An introvert (*coughcough* me) sits with her writer friends at a banquet. Half of the table is empty, and they have no idea if the seats will be filled with other writers, by editors, or by agents. The writers joke and laugh and talk about the conference and the workshops they've attended, and then all of a sudden they all talk quieter and look surprised and eager and oh-so-nervous.
Why?
Kristin Nelson, Sally Harding, and Hannah Bowman. Grabbing. Chairs. At. Our. Table.
I'm fairly certain that my heartbeat, instead of sticking to the regular thump-thunk thump-thunk, went thunka-thonka-thoinka-plunk. Because, let's be honest, if you want one of the best and coolest agents of young adult novels to represent you, you want Kristin Nelson. She is really nice, unfailingly honest, and personable. Oh, and she sells novels to publishers. Lots of them.
Of course, I was 100% terrified. I managed to break the silence with a very breathy, high-pitched "Ohofcourseyoucansithere."
Before I go on, perhaps I should mention that Kristin's agency, which is based in Denver, has rejected my manuscript. Twice. Currently I am in denial that these rejections ever happened, and I'll probably query them again with my next project. Anyway... Kristin sat next to me, and the time that followed was fantastic. Sitting next to Kristian was like having an ex you still have feelings for wink at you from across a crowded room (with the added exception that they have absolutely no idea who you are).
A few minutes of small talk made the wobbly feelings in my stomach subside, and I actually got to have intelligent conversation with Kristin and Sally (Hannah was a bit too far away to join in). After an author appeared out of nowhere to hand Kristin his card and join our table, I felt like I joined the agent club. I viewed the secret aftermath of the author's invasive approach, laughed with them about it, and forgot my nerves so quickly I was able to enjoy the dinner, my friends, and the agents. Even when the new author ruined my chances to pitch to any of them (it's a simple matter of timing and the secret code of When To Pitch And When To Pretend They Don't Represent Your Genre), I didn't feel like a moment had been wasted.
Other people might look at the night and think, "Well, she should have at least tried to pitch" or "How could it possibly not have been wasted if she didn't talk business with at least one of them?" Good question. The short answer? I'll take any encouragement I can get. And when Kristin Nelson tells me that writers are crazy (duh) and I get to hear about her niece, who is 16 and taller than me (I'm 5'10"), I feel encouraged. I believe that as a crazy person, I have the unique right to try the same thing over and over again, with the electrifying, thrilling confidence that one day I will get a different result.
I pull magic, heroes, psychopaths, guts, and glory out of my head and hope other people like it. I spend years working on novels that may never sit on a shelf at Barnes and Noble. I send letters to agents and editors, trying to find just one who, like me, is in love with the world in my head. Those letters don't just go out once. They go out over and over and over again. Just try and tell me that the banquet was a waste, or that I'm crazy. Because having dinner with Kristin Nelson taught me that if I can get her to laugh, other agents will read my words, get the jokes, and fall in love with them. And gaining that optimism can't possibly be a waste.
Showing posts with label convention. Show all posts
Showing posts with label convention. Show all posts
03 October 2013
04 September 2010
The Revival, Part 1
The first chills of autumn were curling around my toes, and it was lovely. I was barefoot on the sidewalk and still in my pajamas, and the best part was that the air smelled fresh like a forest.
Our group had just pulled into a parking spot in front of a small hotel in a valley from a fairy tale. Sara, Courtney, and Teia jumped out and inspected the grounds while Leandra and I talked to the front desk with the other two hanging out behind us.
"I hope you girls won't be bothered by the convention," the lady at the front desk said as she eyed my ancient t-shirt, which had a red hand print creeping over my shoulder.
"There's a place for a convention here?" I asked. I hadn't seen any signs of a large convention center on our way into town. Maybe it was on the other side of something?
"Oh, they just built it! It's a lovely building, too; looks just like a big church," she said. "Shouldn't bother you, though, I think it's mostly young people down here."
Leandra and I exchanged looks and shrugged, and then we gathered everybody and dropped our stuff off in our rooms. The beds went from pristine to upset in a matter of three seconds. Bags were zipping and unzipping all along the line of rooms, which were connected now by unlocked and open doors. Everyone freshened up while I put on some real clothes, and we went out hiking and exploring the town after lunch.
When we got back just before dinner time, our rooms were in an even greater mess than we had left them. Sara tapped me on the shoulder while I was staring, open-mouthed, at the contents of my duffel, which had all been pulled inside-out and dumped on the floor.
"My hoodie is covered in cat hair," she said when I looked at her. I would have laughed, but she had been wearing the hoodie earlier, and it hadn't been covered in fur that morning. Similar reports came from the other rooms. Ava and Natalie were so mad that they stormed out and went to confront the front desk lady. Courtney sat on the side of the bed and then stood up right away.
"Ow! Something poked me!" she yelled. The rest of us watched as she flung the covers off and revealed a rather impressive arrangement of knives under the covers. They were pointing blade up. We all were staring at the bed, trying to figure out how the knives had gotten there, when Natalie fell through the door, pulling Ava through after her. Both girls had thin streams of blood running from small cuts all over their arms, and they were soaking wet.
"Natalie!" I said. "What happened?"
"She tried to kill us!" Natalie gasped. She and Ava were on the floor, wheezing as they tried to catch their breath. Suddenly Natalie sat up, pointed at the door, and screamed, "Shut the door!" Teia reached over and slammed it shut with one arm.
"Are you alright?" Leandra asked Ava. She put her finger tentatively on one of the scratches on her sister's arm, to see how deep it was.
"We're ok," Ava said as she glanced at Natalie, who nodded. It was hard to look at them with so much blood trickling out of their tiny wounds. I sat on my feet in front of them, and everyone rallied behind me so we all could see their faces. Ava was still breathing hard, but Natalie had finally gotten control of herself.
"We went down and asked who'd had the audacity to mess with all of our stuff," Natalie said. "And the old lady just looked at us, stiffened, and screamed at us. So we started backing up, you know? We said we'd come back later." She wiped her nose and left a red smear on her cheekbone. "But when we were walking away she threw something at us."
"What'd she throw? Ninja stars?" Teia asked. I turned to glare at her, and she shrugged. "What?" I shook my head and turned back around.
"No, she didn't throw ninja stars," Ava said. She looked at Nat with wide eyes. Natalie looked terrified. "She threw her cats at us."
The other five of us chuckled until we realized that they were perfectly serious. Courtney took in the myriad of red cuts on their arms and said, "Wait. So...what you're saying is, you were attacked by cats?"
Ava and Natalie nodded. We were silent.
"But why are you wet?" Sara asked.
"We jumped in the pool," Natalie said. For the first time since she'd fallen through the door she looked slightly happy. "And then we got out of the pool."
"What happened to the cats?"
"They didn't get out, we're pretty sure," Natalie said. A moment later, something large thumped on the window. All seven of us practically jumped out of our skins, and Courtney leaned close to the glass to see what it was.
"Hey, guys?" she asked. "By any chance, were there more than two cats?"
"No," said Ava. "Why?"
"Because there are two very wet cats and about sixty very dry cats hissing at our front door," Courtney said. I pushed myself up off of the floor and joined her by the window. Sure enough, there was a legion of angry felines crowded around our door. I spun around and looked at everyone else, not sure if I should be laughing or screaming.
"Did anyone bring a gun?"
Our group had just pulled into a parking spot in front of a small hotel in a valley from a fairy tale. Sara, Courtney, and Teia jumped out and inspected the grounds while Leandra and I talked to the front desk with the other two hanging out behind us.
"I hope you girls won't be bothered by the convention," the lady at the front desk said as she eyed my ancient t-shirt, which had a red hand print creeping over my shoulder.
"There's a place for a convention here?" I asked. I hadn't seen any signs of a large convention center on our way into town. Maybe it was on the other side of something?
"Oh, they just built it! It's a lovely building, too; looks just like a big church," she said. "Shouldn't bother you, though, I think it's mostly young people down here."
Leandra and I exchanged looks and shrugged, and then we gathered everybody and dropped our stuff off in our rooms. The beds went from pristine to upset in a matter of three seconds. Bags were zipping and unzipping all along the line of rooms, which were connected now by unlocked and open doors. Everyone freshened up while I put on some real clothes, and we went out hiking and exploring the town after lunch.
When we got back just before dinner time, our rooms were in an even greater mess than we had left them. Sara tapped me on the shoulder while I was staring, open-mouthed, at the contents of my duffel, which had all been pulled inside-out and dumped on the floor.
"My hoodie is covered in cat hair," she said when I looked at her. I would have laughed, but she had been wearing the hoodie earlier, and it hadn't been covered in fur that morning. Similar reports came from the other rooms. Ava and Natalie were so mad that they stormed out and went to confront the front desk lady. Courtney sat on the side of the bed and then stood up right away.
"Ow! Something poked me!" she yelled. The rest of us watched as she flung the covers off and revealed a rather impressive arrangement of knives under the covers. They were pointing blade up. We all were staring at the bed, trying to figure out how the knives had gotten there, when Natalie fell through the door, pulling Ava through after her. Both girls had thin streams of blood running from small cuts all over their arms, and they were soaking wet.
"Natalie!" I said. "What happened?"
"She tried to kill us!" Natalie gasped. She and Ava were on the floor, wheezing as they tried to catch their breath. Suddenly Natalie sat up, pointed at the door, and screamed, "Shut the door!" Teia reached over and slammed it shut with one arm.
"Are you alright?" Leandra asked Ava. She put her finger tentatively on one of the scratches on her sister's arm, to see how deep it was.
"We're ok," Ava said as she glanced at Natalie, who nodded. It was hard to look at them with so much blood trickling out of their tiny wounds. I sat on my feet in front of them, and everyone rallied behind me so we all could see their faces. Ava was still breathing hard, but Natalie had finally gotten control of herself.
"We went down and asked who'd had the audacity to mess with all of our stuff," Natalie said. "And the old lady just looked at us, stiffened, and screamed at us. So we started backing up, you know? We said we'd come back later." She wiped her nose and left a red smear on her cheekbone. "But when we were walking away she threw something at us."
"What'd she throw? Ninja stars?" Teia asked. I turned to glare at her, and she shrugged. "What?" I shook my head and turned back around.
"No, she didn't throw ninja stars," Ava said. She looked at Nat with wide eyes. Natalie looked terrified. "She threw her cats at us."
The other five of us chuckled until we realized that they were perfectly serious. Courtney took in the myriad of red cuts on their arms and said, "Wait. So...what you're saying is, you were attacked by cats?"
Ava and Natalie nodded. We were silent.
"But why are you wet?" Sara asked.
"We jumped in the pool," Natalie said. For the first time since she'd fallen through the door she looked slightly happy. "And then we got out of the pool."
"What happened to the cats?"
"They didn't get out, we're pretty sure," Natalie said. A moment later, something large thumped on the window. All seven of us practically jumped out of our skins, and Courtney leaned close to the glass to see what it was.
"Hey, guys?" she asked. "By any chance, were there more than two cats?"
"No," said Ava. "Why?"
"Because there are two very wet cats and about sixty very dry cats hissing at our front door," Courtney said. I pushed myself up off of the floor and joined her by the window. Sure enough, there was a legion of angry felines crowded around our door. I spun around and looked at everyone else, not sure if I should be laughing or screaming.
"Did anyone bring a gun?"
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